March 28, 2024
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March 28, 2024
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Linking Northern and Central NJ, Bronx, Manhattan, Westchester and CT

Many parents who send their children to a Jewish school or after-school program naively believe that their children will automatically learn to speak Hebrew. Of course, the reality is that far too few students in the United States achieve Hebrew fluency. Other than ordering falafel or asking to use the restroom, many students struggle stringing words, let alone whole sentences, together intelligibly b’Ivrit. This is a major gap in modern Jewish education and, to be frank, a lamentable linguistic lacuna.

Why aren’t more American Jewish students fluent or at least proficient in Hebrew? Why do they struggle with becoming bilingual brainiacs and multisyllabic mensches?

Experience shows that learning Hebrew solely in a classroom environment for only one hour a day will not lead to Hebrew fluency. It requires far more time and dedication and cannot be achieved in concrete commitment to communicate in the only remaining Canaanite language. This reality, however, does not apply solely to learning Hebrew. For example, some cities in the United States feature a “Little Italy” that exudes the best of the Old Country. But, if you stroll through Little Italy for only one hour a day, you will not become fluent in Italian. (You might become proficient in pasta.) Other cities in this great land have a “Chinatown” that recreates some of the wonderful sights, sounds and rhythms of China. But if you hang out in Chinatown for only one hour a day, you will not become fluent in Chinese. (You might develop a talent for Tai Chi.) No city on the planet officially features a “Little Israel,” likely because Israel is small enough as it is. (Creating a “Little Israel” would be like creating a miniature version of mini-golf.) But if a “Little Israel” did exist and you were to walk its streets for only one hour per day, you would not become fluent in Hebrew. (You might become fluent in falafel.)

In other words, briefly dipping your toe in the pool does not a swimmer make. For this reason, some Jewish schools and after-school programs have resorted to Hebrew “immersion” wherein students are submerged (just short of drowning) in a Hebrew-speaking environment. Such students are (lovingly) forced to converse in the Israeli vernacular and, while in immersion, only fluency will keep them afloat. It is a sink-or-swim situation and while some thrive, not everyone remains above water.

Here’s an alternative idea. Instead of waiting until the post-high school gap year to send our kids to Israel, let’s flip the script. We should send kids to Israel in nursery school to live in the Holyland for at least one full year. If we do so, our children likely will be fully fluent in Hebrew. So fluent, in fact, that upon return their non-fluent parents may be unable to understand them.

Interestingly, relatively few Jews are clamoring for Yiddish fluency, which is somewhat disappointing. When our children grow up and become parents, in what language will they speak to their spouses when they want to say something aloud to each other but still keep it secret from their children? Isn’t that a primary and arguably essential use of Yiddish? In addition, shouldn’t every self-respecting Jew be able to rattle off the most essential Yiddish terms like nudnik, farshtunken and schmegegge?

Another reason to learn Hebrew is for basic safety when traveling in Israel. If you speak only broken Hebrew, you are bound to utter the wrong thing to the wrong person at the wrong time. For example, if you are very sensitive to spicy food and someone offers you charif (hot sauce), you better know your Hebrew or else you might wind up in the hospital.

The strange thing is that students in Israel often learn English as a second language with relatively little difficulty. Why is that? Are they placed in highly effective English immersion programs? Are they more intelligent or more conversantly capable? Is English easier to learn? Are they more interested in learning English than American children are in learning Hebrew? Are they paid to learn English?

Ah-ha! Therein lies the rub. Why don’t we monetarily incentivize our children into learning Hebrew? Why not offer a few Benjamins for Bets, gelt for Gimmels, dollars for Daleds and cash for Kufs? If we use currency to finance fluency, wouldn’t that be a worthwhile investment in education?

Final thought: English is read from left to right, Hebrew is read from right to left and at the optometrist office, the eye charts are read from top to bottom.

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