Two weeks ago, my wife, without telling me, wrote in The Link a beautiful love note in honor of our 50th wedding anniversary. I will put it away together with the many hundreds of notes that she has written to me over the years. On the rare occasion, when she was going away for a trip, she surreptitiously left notes under my pillow, in my sock drawer and countless other places. I was amazed and overwhelmed, especially when finding other beautiful notes in the cupboard, next to the bathtub, and in many other nooks and crannies. When I went away for a day or two she somehow managed to put notes in my overnight bag, in my Tallis Zekel and found many other places to hide brief beautiful thoughts. When I went to shul the next morning and opened the Tallis bag, my davening was filled with gratitude and awe at the most amazing woman who is always at my side.
This past Shabbos, we stayed at our daughter’s home in Teaneck. Though it is only a mile away from our home in Bergenfield, my arthritic knee makes it very difficult for me to walk. It was great being together with her and her family and as an added bonus, at lunchtime, our other daughter and her family joined us for a wonderful Shabbos afternoon.
Being at our daughter’s home afforded me the opportunity to attend Rabbi Larry Rothwach’s Shabbos Hagadol drasha. It was mind boggling and to anyone really paying attention, potentially life changing. Rabbi Rothwachs spoke about many of his experiences since the donation of his kidney to Donny Hain. He strongly disagreed with the oft repeated claim that he is a hero. He simply did what he felt moved to do. And then he said something that blew me away. He said that he only gave his kidney. His wife gives her kishkes to their children and to many many people in the community. It is so true of both of them – they are in fact amazing people. And then I started to think about my precious wife.
She is a mother, grandmother, and great (truly great) grandmother. She is the center of our family and provides what every child (and adult) craves for – a mother who deeply cares and is always there for each and every one of us. For the last week, she has been buying ties and other things, to open her semi-annual tie store so that each of our grandsons can choose a tie for Yom Tov. She’s been doing that twice a year – on Pesach and Succot for many years and can’t go into any store at any time of the year without spending a fair amount of time (and money) on our grandchildren and great grandchildren. For me she is much more than that. She is my spark, my life and the essence of everything that I have lived for. She is a wonderful friend (so much more than that, but I don’t have the words to describe it), an amazing listener, an intensely caring human being and a model for all of us. She has devoted herself since our daughter, Naama’s, birth forty five years ago, to ensuring that everything that could be done for her, was done. She made the impossible happen. From bringing Naama into shul at age two in a wheelchair to a typical group of shulgoers and in a short period of time converted them to loving wonderful friends. She started groups for parents of children with special needs (and later dropped out of the groups upon finding that most of the parents were simply stuck on crying about how terrible life was). She pushed for services at the Montreal children’s hospital and helped guide the therapists in providing their programs. Most amazingly, we knew when Naama was moving into adolescence that she would need to move into a home that would provide her with the best care possible and the maximum amount of independence that she was capable of. Nina, along with a few others, did the impossible and started a wonderful frum group home. Even today from Teaneck she is involved in the management and raising funds to ensure that this group home will continue to function in the best way possible.
It is now 50 years and almost two weeks since that fateful day on Bait Nissan. Actually it is 53 or 54 years since we first met. I remember a while later at an NCSY Shabbaton walking with the person who a number of years later would become my partner for life. I awkwardly said something like it would be wonderful if we could always be together. That evening, Nina rushed back to her dear friend Rosalie. They talked throughout the night and for many more about my proposal. I hadn’t thought about it as a proposal, but it was. And it was the single most amazing, wonderful and miraculous event of our life.
My Dvorah (that is the way I refer to Nina), you are the spirit of my life, the sun moon and stars of my existence, and will be forever more. My Dvorah, I love you.
By Rabbi Mordechai Glick
